


A simple question

by dalovely



Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: Bucket List, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:15:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27818149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dalovely/pseuds/dalovely
Summary: It all started with a question.A simple enough question, an innocent question that spiraled April's live out of control.-Or the one where April starts to live life like she wants it, there is a bucket list, nosy roonmates, sleepovers, "This is not what it looks like" situations, a proposition and a lot of pie.
Relationships: Jackson Avery/April Kepner
Comments: 5
Kudos: 16





	1. The question

It all started with a question.   
  
A simple enough question, an innocent question that spiraled April's live out of control.   
  
°  
April's was attending an elderly woman, she was in her late eighties, with white cotton hair and wrinkles around her eyes and mouth -signs that she laughed a lot- and by the way she was acting, April would point that as true.   
  
She would rambled to her nephew -A tall and broad guy named Stuart- about the time she fly out a plane, or the time she danced go-go in a casino in Vegas, or the time she met his grandfather, or the time she looked at a tiger right in the eye and he sneered at her. All with a smile, telling jokes left and right.   
  
"That didn't happen" Stuart would say.   
"How do you know it didn't? Where you there?" She would respond.  
  
She was dying -the woman that's it- her name was Beverly, she was in stage four of breast cancer, they could have done more for her but Beverly didn't want that anymore "I would like to go while I still feel like me" she said.   
  
She was a force of nature April soon realize, engaging everyone and talking about everything. At first she would only tell stories then after a while, she began to ask for them.   
  
First to his grandson, she would ask really sweet one's "Tell me how you met Patrick" –Stuart husband- with a giddy look in her eyes or really embarrassing ones "Tell me about the time you popped your pants at school"   
"Ugh. Grandma" Stuart would say while his ears turn red, avoiding looking at anyone but at her.   
"None of that now, don't be embarrassed. What's the point of living If we don't laugh at ourselves from time to time, and that story is hilarious so come on now, I need a laugh"   
  
And that was fun but then she started to engage April and that wasn't as fun "Have you ever popped your pants?" She would ask out of the blue while April was checking her values.   
"No miss, I don't think I have" April would replay while stuttering.   
"Bummer" A disappointed Beverly would say.   
  
"Have you ever go skydiving?" She would ask while April did her morning visit.   
"No miss"   
  
"Have you ever traveled to another country?" She would ask while April fixed her via.   
"No miss"  
  
"Have you ever been in love?" She asks out of the blue while April did her last round for the day.   
"Grandma" Stuart intervened from the couch "is not correct to-"   
"Hush now" she replied "I am talking with the pretty doctor"  
  
"Tell me darling, how old are you?" She said while looking at April and grabbing her hand.   
"28"  
"Now, how can a beautiful girl like you never been in love?"  
April wasn't sure how to replay to that, if she should lie or tell the truth so she just said "I don't know how to replay to that miss"  
Beverly though for a moment "Have you broken a lot of hearts? Are you a heartbreaker, is that it?"   
"No miss"  
"Now that's a shame" and to that April laughed, if it was someone else she would have found those questions annoying and intruding but this woman was nice, she just founded funny.   
"A beautiful girl like you, so smart, a doctor no less should know that a life worth living is full with love, giving love or receiving it but ideally the love should be mutual. Got that?"  
"Yes miss" April said "I got that".

°

The day passed and Beverly’s health by the day go worst and worst, but the questions keep on coming, and the stories too "The tiger look right into my eyes and sneered, I thought my life was going to be over but I wasn't going to go without a fight so I sneered right back at him"   
"Now that didn't happen" Stuart say.   
"How do you know it didn't? Where you there?" She responded.  
  
Sometimes she would get a dreamy look in her eyes and out of the blue, she would start to talk about her husband "The first time I met my Arturh I didn’t look at him twice, he wasn't the most handsome man at the party, I can tell you that. He was wearing a really funny bow tie and pointy white shoes. He looked awful!” She laughed.

“But he knew how to dance" she said while holding her hands to her heart "And when he danced you could not look at anyone but at him, he knew how to move, how to shimmy and he wasn't afraid to go wild in the dance floor" she sighs "I love that about him. He was very shy but in the dance floor he just let loose, it was beautiful to see, it was beautiful to be a part of. I miss that about him"

She looked far away when she said “I made a right choice with him. All our lives he always supported me, you see. When you’re my age you realized that life is all about the moments that make you happy or really really sad and how you experience them and the people you experience them with. And my Arthur, he did good by me, he was always there, through the good and the worst. He gave me a lot of happy moments and he dread giving me the sad ones. He did good by me”  
  
When the day arrived for her to be gone, they all knew it was coming, one day she woke up with all of this energy and they knew it was the beginning of the end. She was “surging”.   
Dr. Webber and April when to her room to check on her and to ask her grandson about the last arrangements.   
"April! Is good to see you” Beverly said with a smile.

"You too miss Beverly. How are you feeling today?" April replied.

"Very good, better than good actually" Beverly said.

"That's good” She said smiling back.

“Mr. Beverly is good to see you are feeling better“ Dr. Webber replied “Mr. Suart would you mind going outside with me for a moment?” he said looking directly to Beverly’s grandson.

“Sure, no problem” And they both left the room.

“Is time isn’t it?” Beverly asked.

“Time for what miss?” April replied.

“Now don’t play dumb” She said while scowling “Is better to go with the truth, is it time for me to go?”

April didn’t want to replied but she own her patient to go with the truth “Yes, sadly it is” she said looking down “How did you know?”

“A girl knows” Beverly said “When you been as sick as me for so long and suddenly you feel amazing” she sighs “One knows”

April didn’t replied, so there was only silence in the room until Beverly looked at her and say “Now don’t be sad, I had a good life, a really good one. I’m ok to go”

“That’s good, going without regrets” April said.

“I do have them, nobody can go without regrets. But I’m ok because I fix them when it was time. I apologized when my pride got the best of me. I said I love you when I could. You know what my biggest regret is?” She asked grabbing April’s hand. “Apologizing so much, hid myself, second guess myself until it was too late. One day I realized what I was doing and I promise myself that I would stop. That I would start trusting myself more and having my own back. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes I still doubt, confidence is like a lipstick, one has to constantly applying it. But it feels good, to tell oneself ‘we got this’ and believing it.” Beverly started chuckling “Now look at me, rambling about life. You sure have many things to do.”

April smiled “Is ok. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to.”

“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to” Beverly repeated “That’s nice; I’m going to remember that. My Arthur would say ‘My feet are exactly where they want to be’ it was his way of saying that he wanted to be with me” Beverly sighed “He was good to me” And then Beverly fell asleep.

°

April’s shift was over; she decided to go to Joe’s bar. She needed a drink so she ordered one as she started to push herself up on a stool to sit at the bar.

“Hey, April! Over here.” Alex shouted. He sat in a booth with Meredith and Jackson.

April walked over to them and slid into the booth, holding her drink in both hands. Jackson was tucked into the far side next to Meredith making the only space available next to Alex. They were talking about the day specifically about the conversation that happened earlier. Talk about an embarrassing moment.

“Come on. Just admit it. You're still a virgin.” Alex said.

“No, I'm not.” April lied.

“Hey, there's no shame in it,” Jackson added after taking a drink. 

“Really?” she asked with a dry tone in her voice.

“No, there's shame,” Jackson said laughing.

April just send him a death glare while she took a drink.

“A lot of shame.” Alex agreed and April glared at him. “Tell her, Mer.”

“I, um - I was going to say something, and then I forgot to stop drinking,” Meredith mumbled, all flushed, giggly and drunk. “Has anybody seen Cristina?”

Lexie arrived telling everyone about the psycho who run down the hall naked and how that’s everyone is talking about at the hospital “so I'm feeling pretty good, you know, for a crazy person.”

“Well, nobody gives a crap if you're crazy. We're all crazy.” Jackson said.

“Yeah, look at April. She's still a virgin.” Alex told her, laughing hysterically. Great now Lexie knew, at this rate, everyone at the hospital would know.

“Yeah, well, Mark gives a crap, okay? He stares at me like I'm a menace to myself and everyone around me?” Lexie said but quickly she registers what Alex said and started to snicker. “Wait. You're still a virgin?”

“Stop. Okay? Just stop. I'm a virgin.” She said having enough. She was tired of them constantly making fun of her. Of no one being on her corner. She remembers what Beverly said. If no one was going to have her back she was going to do that herself. “Yes. So, what? It's not something I talk about, okay? We all have things we don't talk about.”

“Alex, you've been afraid of the elevator for, like, a month, but I never said anything because it's none of my business.” She turned away from him and pinned Jackson with a hard stare. “And, Jackson, you wake up every night screaming because you have nightmares. And, Meredith, you don't talk about Cristina because you're afraid she's never going to be the same Cristina again. And, Lexie,” she laughed dryly. “For God sake, Mark never thought you were a psycho. He loves you. That's why he stares at you because he can't keep his eyes off the woman he loves. Of course, he's never going to say anything 'cause he doesn't feel like he can!”

“Look, we all have stuff we don't talk about!” April inhaled deeply and turned the glass on the table. “I am a 28-year-old virgin, mainly because I wanted my first time to be special, and then I waited too long, and partly because I'm pretty sure guys find me annoying.”

“I'm a virgin. That doesn't make it drinks conversation. We all have stuff we don't talk about!” April downed the rest of her drink, she needed liquid courage after what she said but she was on a roll and she wasn’t going to stop “Stuff that is our own, my virginity doesn’t affect any of you, is not something you guys can talk about! And no Alex, there is no shame in it. When I lose it and if I lose it is up to me to decide and is up to me to decide who knows, is not something you can just discuss and make fun of me for. Is my body. Is my choice and I will not sit here and let you make fun of me for that”. She finished with a decisive node.

“Oh, April. I'm liking you more and more.” Meredith said after a moment.

“Thank you.” She said while sipping the rest of her drink. They all drank in uncomfortable silence until April’s excuse herself from the table. “Hey April, stay. You don’t have to go, we were assholes” Jackson said from the end of the table.

“Yes you were” April replied to his surprise “But that’s not the reason I’m leaving” She said while putting on her jacket “My page just went off, my patient when into shock” And on that note she started to go to the hospital.

When she arrived to Beverly’s room, Rosa –The head nurse- was fixing her pillow “How is she?” April asked grabbing Beverly history from Rosa’s hand.

“Her levels when up for a moment and she went into chock, we administrated her 50cc of epinephrine and 40cc of glucocorticoids. She stable now but her values are not getting better”

April sighed “We knew this was going to happen” looking at Rosa, she replied “You did well” looking at the empty couch in the corner; she asked “Where is Stuart?”

“He went to the bathroom” Rosa said “I think he needed a moment.”

“I understand” April said “You can go; I will stay with her until he returns”

April go closer to Beverly’s bed, looking at her values on the machine until Beverly started to wake up and said “The pretty doctor”

“Hey Beverly” April said “How are you feeling?”

“I been better” Beverly replied.

“I’m sorry to hear that”

“Is ok. It will get better.”

April just smiles at that close-mouthed. She didn’t to lie to her but also didn’t want to bring her down.

“You know I been looking at you” Beverly said “All the time I been here, I been looking at you”

“Really? Why?” April asked

“You remind me of me. When I was younger I was just like you”

“A doctor?”

“A brunette” And with that they both laughed. “Before my hair was like yours. My Arthur love it, he would say that It was the coffee in my hair and eyes that keep him awake and alive. He was a poet you see. Always making thinks more beautiful than they were” Beverly sighed “I miss that about him, I miss him. That’s why I am ok. I know my grandson will be ok, he has a good family, and he will be ok. And me, I had a good life. A really good one. And I know that I will be reuniting with my Arthur. I will ok too”.

“That’s lovely” April said.

“But while I’m here I will give you some advices” Beverly said while making herself more comfortable in the pillows “You remind me of me, so I will say to you what I wish someone had told me, ok?”

“Ok” April replied, not really knowing what Beverly could say to her.

“I don’t know if this will help you but if God is good it will do” She took a moment and said “First and this is important, it took me a while to figure it out. When things get hard you have to be your biggest cheerleader. Especially when things get hard you must have your own back. Take care of yourself. In any way that might be, you have to look out for yourself.”

“Second” She said while holding up a finger “You have to make things that make you happy. Whatever that might be. If is singing in the shower, doing that at the top of your lungs. And if is dancing in the kitchen while making breakfast, then you do that. Life is hard enough. One has to take care of themselves” She look up “Don’t get me wrong. You don’t have to be selfish with your happiness, you can be happy for someone else or if making someone happy makes you happy, then you do that. you know? Make them happy” Beverly said looking at April “But don’t sacrifice your happiness for someone else, don’t twist yourself into pieces because you don’t want to someone else to be unhappy, ok?”

“Ok” April replied, absorbing all this in.

“Third” Beverly said “Is important to learn to say no, if someone makes you uncomfortable, if you don’t feel good about something. You have to learn to say no without guilt. Without second guessing yourself”

“Fourth” Beverly said “Is good to ask for help. So if you need it, get it” She got a faraway look “Is ok to be sad, or angry, or really fuckup” and to this April chuckled “Is ok to feel all this emotions at any time or at once. What is not ok is to trick oneself into not feeling anything at all. So my advice is, to feel it all. That’s what are emotions for. And if anytime you feel like is all too much to feel alone, you ask for help. Ok?”

“Fith, get someone to share life with that is good” Beverly smile “Like my Arthur, someone who makes you better but at the same time makes you happy. Is ok if it takes you a couple of tries” She started to snicker “God knows it took me more than a couple. But I was happy doing it and at the end I find a good one, it was good”.

“Sixth and this is important child, so remember this!” April nodded “Do not carry shame around you, live your life as you want to live it. Trying to not hurt anyone but forgiving yourself when you do. To do things that make you happy without offering explication or feeling embarrassed about it. To love how you want to love without hiding. I know that God love us enough for us to be ourselves, all the time. So no hiding, no shame. Got that?”

“Yes miss” April said, processing all that Beverly just said.

“Hey grandma, you’re awake?” Stuart said entering the room.

“Hey honey” Beverly replied “Good to see you”.

“You too granny” He said while going to grab Beverly second hand.

“Where were you?” Beverly asked.

“I was in the bathroom” Stuart said.

“Where you pooping?”

“Grandma!” Stuart said with a scandalized look in his face.

“What?” She replied with fake seriousness “Can a girl just ask?”

And with that at 01:32 am, between inappropriate jokes and advises not asked Beverly passed away. To be with Arthur, April would like to think.

°

When April arrived home at three o’clock she was wired. Today was her day off and her plans were sleeping all day but she couldn’t. She couldn’t stop taking about Beverly and in a way about Reed too.

She had made a wonderful work about avoiding thinking about it. Not thinking about the shooting. Not thinking about coming face to face with the shooter. Not thinking about Renee. Ignoring the sadness that comes with losing her best friend, to not feel that raw and open wound again. But tonight she would allow herself to do that, to feel it all. For Beverly. For Reed. And if she is honest, for herself as well.

While April cried she started to think about time and how it all was a construct. You could think you had all the time in the world and then in a moment all that time turns into dust. Forever sometimes just last a second she though.

And she started thinking about all the things she hadn’t done. And all the things she regrets not doing. And all the things he would like to do. And realized that all of them had something in common. A thing in common. Time.

I would do this and I will feel this and I experience this when the time is right. And tonight April didn’t have the patience to do that anymore. So she went to her closet, opens a box and grabs her red notebook. Something she had hidden out of fear of mocking but not right now, she needed to be herself.

April started writing everything that Beverly said and anything that she could remember feeling about Reed. She needed to get it all out. She needed to release the sadness and feel it all at the same time. She was in a trance, just her, the paper, the pen and the feelings that were eating her open from the inside.

When she was done, she had fill ten pages, her writing was awful and it didn’t looked nice but if she was honest, she felt better. And that was the goal of this.

She looked at the clock and said it was 04:35 in the morning. A lot of time had pass since she got home and she probably should go to sleep but she couldn’t, not yet. She was on a roll and needed to write this wave before she crashed.

April turned into a new page in the notebook and starts to write in neat font at the top of the page the question that haunted her all day “What would you like to do?”

A question that Beverly asked, innocently. A simple question but oh so complicated.

What would you like to do? What would you like to live? What would you like to remember? And what are you going to do to make it happen?

She stared at Beverly and just like staring at the paper; she didn’t know what to say. She knew she wanted to be a doctor. She knew that she wanted to save lives and she knew she wanted to be in love. But other than that she was blank.

April remembers that moment and how Beverly grabbed her hand and said “Don’t worry dear, you will figure it out. And when you do, just remember that destiny does work but you have to work too, make way for whatever it is that you want to achieve”.

She looks at the page and knows in a way what she wants, but she is a little bit afraid to put it on paper, to make it real for herself. But she hears on her head “No shame” and starts to write the list that most definitely will make her life change.


	2. A small step foward

April woke up at 11 am; she was drowsy and still really sleepy. She wanted to go back to sleep but her stomach was having none of it. Food and coffee, that’s what she needed.

She got out of bed and went to the bathroom, she looked herself in the mirror and notice her eyes were all puffy and swollen, proof that she been crying. Good that she was alone in the house, that way no one would ask her what’s going on? Or maybe not, she knows that everyone is avoiding all that happened in their own way anyway.

April comes down to the kitchen and looks around; she sees the pile of clean dishes and opens the fridge just to close it a second later. If she is honest, she doesn’t feel like cooking, she doesn’t have the energy to do that. So she decides to go out, by herself, to eat.

There is place around the 5th called the “Dream baker”, she had been dying to go for a while now, she and Reed had made plans to go but she had avoided it. Today she feels a tender type of bravery, like she can looks at her problems head on because she is no longer afraid it might break her, she knows that she is already broken. After what happened, they all are. You can watch everyone you know fighting for their life and pretend it will not affect you. And that’s the problem, she has been doing that. Pretending to continue life without accepting that she never will be as she was before. _Have your own back_ , she remembers.

She needs to start accepting this new version of her and if she is being honest, start to love her too.

So is decide, she is going out and today she will have her own back.

April takes a shower and changes her clothes, grabbing everything that she might need –Her phone, her purse, her wallet- she looks at the bed and sees the red notebook, she goes and grabs it. She needs that too.

°

April is sitting in a corner of the dream baker, the place is filled with pastel colors and images of cupcakes, and as soon as April opened the door the smell of deliciousness attacked her. This was a good place to be.

She decides to have waffles with the house maple syrup, an orange juice and for dessert a slice of strawberry pie.

While she waits for the food to get to her table she decides to take out her notebook and look at the list. Seeing it all out in the open after spending the night writing it is a bit overwhelming. She wrote the list in a moment of vulnerability, writing it felt liberating. Like the first step to making something. Change something. Move forward with the way she feels.

It’s a good list. She can say admit that. All of the things writhed there are things she wants to do. It’s nice. Like a dream board of what she wants to experience and live. The thing is… she doesn’t want them to be just dreams. She wants to live them, to make them real. And that is the overwhelming part.

Because she doesn’t know where to start.

“Here you go” The waitress says “Waffles, orange juice and a slice of our very best strawberry pie”

“Thank you so much” April replies a little bit giddy “The food looks really good”.

“Hopefully you think it taste better” The girl replies retreating “Have a nice meal” and leaves to her spot at the register once again.

That leaves April alone with her thoughts, again, but with food. And everything is always better with food.

April looks at her list and starts to read one by one the things she wrote last night.

_What would you like to do?_

  1. _Be a good doctor_
  2. _Stand up for myself_
  3. _Be a better friend_
  4. _Make better friends_
  5. _Dye my hair_
  6. _Find a specialty I’m passionate about_
  7. _Fall in love_
  8. _Be love by someone_
  9. _Have sex_
  10. _Have an orgasm_
  11. _Get married_
  12. _Have a baby_
  13. _Help others_
  14. _Be unapologetic myself_
  15. _Do something unexpected_



She knows that some of the things on her list she will not accomplish tomorrow, and some of the things here are outside of her control to do but some of them aren’t, so she decided to start with them. 

  1. _Dye my hair_



She had always wanted to die her hair, change the color into something more vibrant, a color she would look herself in the mirror and love.

“Hey! Excuse me” April says to the waitress when she comes to bring the bill “I’m thinking about doing something with my hair. Do you know any salons that are over here?”

“Yeah, sure” The waitress says “Right around the corner, there is a place called Giorgio, they are amazing. Is my go to place to color my hair” She says pointing out at the highlights of her hair.

“Nice” April says “Thank you” And with that is decided, she is going to change her hair color.

°

Later that night she is lying in bed thinking about that day, she felt so good after doing something for herself, she eat and stayed in her room, she didn’t want to see anyone just yet. Jackson knocks into her room when he arrived but she didn’t respond. She doesn’t know why. I guess they do need to talk; she isn’t mad, it wasn’t that serious what he said in the bar but I guess she is disappointed because he is her best friend. A joke is only a joke until you get hurt and yeah, she got hurt. And it sucks that he was the one who hurt her. She doesn’t want to explain to anyone what it should be personal and doesn’t like to feel judge about it.

 _“No shame”_ She mutters to herself looking at the ceiling. _“No shame”_

She turns back to sleep, she has a big day tomorrow when she hears a scream coming from outside, a scream laud and painful, like someone running from a nightmare, a scream that travels across her body and wakes her. She knows that scream and for the first time in a long time she doesn’t doubt, she gets up and goes to the door at the other side of the hall. She stands at the door and says _“Be a better friend”_ even if he hasn’t been. She opens the door and sees Jackson kicking and screaming in his bed, he is asleep and probably won’t wake up for a couple of minutes but she needs to do something because seeing him like this is physically hurting her.

So she rounds the bed and hugs him, so tight, we so much force as she can muster, she reads that this calms people down, it releases endorphins in their brain that comes with the feeling of calmness.

At first he fights her more but she starts to say “Hey, is ok. Is really ok” trying to soothe whatever nightmare he is having tonight. “Everything is ok” He is sweating and his eyebrows are furrowed but little by little he is starting to calm down until he wakes up.

“Is ok, everything is fine” April keeps whispering over and over again.

“April” Jackson says when he becomes aware that this is not a dream, when he notices that she is in his bed. “What are you doing here?”

“You were having a nightmare” April says “I read somewhere that cuddling with someone while they are having a nightmare helps soothing them down. So I decide to try tonight” She says shyly.

Jackson looks at her, she hasn’t let go of him. Her head is in his chest and his legs are on top of his and it feels… good.

“Thank you” He says looking at her eyes, fighting the racing of his heart. The nightmare was worse this time, they are getting worse, every time.

“You are welcome” April says realizing now that she hasn’t let go of him. Cheekily she extracts her arms and legs and moves to the other side of the bed, lying perfectly across from him. She looks at him. He looks at her. This is weird, they have never share a bed before.

“How are you feeling?” April asks

“Not great” He says

“You really need to start talking with someone about them” He tried to avoid her eyes looking elsewhere “Jackson seriously I’m worried about you”

He doesn’t say anything; this is how it always goes. He doesn’t want to get help; he doesn’t want to talk about it.

He looks at her for a long time “Did you do something to your hair?”

April smiles “Yes, I dyed. Do you like it?”

“Yeah it looks good. Red is really your color”

“I know right?” April says and Jackson smiles. He feels calm or calmer than he usually is after a nightmare.

“I decided that I needed a change, so I did it” April says proudly.

“It looks good” Jackson says, touching a strand of her hair and April breath shakes. She hasn’t been touched this way, a side of his hand touches her cheek and she feels like that spot will burn for a thousand lifetimes and she hopes she is camouflage this reaction because she doesn’t want him to notice.

“I have to go” April says moving back.

“Yeah, yeah of course” Jackson says moving to sit on the bed.

April looks down to found her sleepers when she hears “April”

“Yeah” she says turning round.

“I’m sorry about yesterday. I was an ass” He says sincerely

April looks at him and says “Yes, you were”

At that Jackson laughs “Yeah, I know. What you said is true; I have no right to make fun of you for that is just that I don’t know. I guess I don’t get it”

“What?” She asks

“What would you wait this long?”

April smiles “If I been honest sometimes I don’t know either” She says in a laugh “Is true what I said at the bar, I did wait because I wanted to be special and then I waited too long, but is also” She says thinking “I guess for a long time it was a promise that I had with God, I know that you don’t believe in him?” She says looking at Jackson “But for me it was special, but… when the shooting happen and he was pointing a gun at my head, the only think I could think was… that I didn’t want to die a virgin” and at that Jackson doesn’t know what to say “Look at me being all depressing and talking about the moment that should not be named and” April says.

“Hey, hey is ok. You can talk to me” Jackson says “I know that I don’t talk about it but is hard, but you can talk to me” And they look at each other and a piece of understanding pass between them. The knowledge that comes from knowing what the other is going through.

“And about being a virgin” Jackson says trying to make light of the situation “There is an easy solution for that”

“Are you… propositioning me?” April asks

“Oh god no” he says

“Right I didn’t mean” she says

“I was just saying” he says

“Yes, I know. I was you know” she says

“That you could” he says

“It was a joke, not a good one apparently” she says

And at that they both laugh. At their own embarrassing situation and it feels good, laughing with a friend. Laughing together, it feels good. 

“But yeah I have to go” April says

“Yeah, I get that. Early day tomorrow and all that” Jackson says

“Yeah”

But when April is at the door Jackson says “April”

“Yeah?” She says, turning around.

“Thank you” He says “For coming here, for being my friend”

“Anytime” She says and means it.

And with that she goes into her room and goes back to sleep, ignoring the weight in her cheek and the calmness in her heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really don't know if that works for people with nightmares but it felt right at the time to put it.   
> Everything here is fictional.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi Everyone! This is my first Japril fic and my second fic all around. This story hit me out of the blue and I hope I can do it justice to the narrative in my head. I hope you guys like it and enjoy it as much as I do writing it.  
> This is going to be a slow burn, it is a Japril story but it might take them a couple of chapters to get there. I don't know exactly how many chapters this story will have but I promise that I will finish writing it. 
> 
> Disclaimer: I am not a doctor, neither do I have medical knowledge, so everything medical state it here grab it like a grain of salt.  
> Also, I don't own the characters or the series, just this story.


End file.
